New here advice appreciated

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  • aaaaaaaaa!!!! @yurisen this is amazing!!!! well done 2 weeks is major!! keep going you're doing so good x

  • @joy thank you so much!!!!
  • @claudia.grace ohhh hello!! I'm so grateful that I'm not alone either thanks for reaching out. I hope you all the best of luck because I know how bad it gets at this age and how stuck in life it can make us feel.

    Yesss give those ideas a go and feedback here or somewhere else Im really interested to see what works for you just make sure you're open minded to anything and be as creative as you can. ( I Used a clean back massager instead of a real scalp massager) - because I didn't want my parents attention to what I bought.

    Yay have a nice day :3 !
  • @Gir it's all thanks to your and everyone else's advice here , appreciate it alot πŸ’˜
  • So an update:

    Im still trich free I think it's 16 days now I'll need to check. The methods I've been using:

    -Wearing a hat during the whole day, I take it off when I sleep and am confident I won't pull, also when I wake up I don't have it on so I brush my hair to massage my scalp and distribute the hair oils and then tie it up and wear the hat tucking every hair in.
    - having the scalp massager on my study table and whenever my head itches I use it it actually feels better than pulling now.

    Of course these are the things that still have an impact after 2 weeks of being pull free, before the 2 weeks there were alot more things I did even small things to ensure I don't pull but since some things don't trigger me anymore I no longer do them. However if anyone wants the full list I'd be happy to share them. Good luck to anyone reading this !

    Have a good day ✨
  • @yurisen yes thank you so much and im definitely going to try all of those things ive been wearing a hat for a few months now during the day and i use fidget/stress toys to distract myself but i always somehow end up pulling. i tried settting a goal to work towards/a reason not to such as when it gets to a certain length i can dye it as like a reward/something to work towards and look forward to. not sure if it works also ive been told by my mental health person forgot who he is who said when i get the urge to pull day out loud "stop" or something until the urge is gone which only works when i am aware of the urge because sometimes i do it without realising. so i need to be more aware of what im doing and recognise the feelings. have a nice day too!!
  • @claudia.grace Mm yes I also started with trying to get myself to be more conscious of my actions and I did that by placing post it notes on all my mirrors in the position where I would be able to see my hair and the note says don't look. That helped me stop pulling when I tried to look in the mirror and see small triggering hairs and it worked because before I saw the triggering hairs I wasn't triggered and so avoiding looking was easier. As for the rewarding system it has never worked for me and I wish it did because in the moment when you're reaching to pull that feeling you know will come when you pull becomes so much greater than anything else which is why it over powers us.
    I think for you it's important that you journal after you go through pulling to find these holes in your methods like why eventhough you wore a hat and played with fidget toys did you still pull? Did you take the hat off? - if yes then don't take it off anymore for a while, did you forget your fidget toy somewhere? - make sure you have it will you at all times and don't be lazy about it put it in a jacket pocket or something. Things like wearing your hat all the time and taking your fidget toy can seem exaggerating but you never know when the thought to pull will hit you hard and when it does you need to be ready and you need to work hard and stop beating around the bush , you need to target your holes head on.

    Ahhhh sorry if that's too much to read but I have experienced hair pulling for 8 years πŸ˜­πŸ’—

    ~Yuri
  • @yurisen im gonna try that writing notes and putting them around so i remember. we think my trichotillomania is part of my OCD but it's so hard to overcome ive been pulling out my eyebrow and eyelash hairs for years but i kind of stopped/its not as bad now but pulling out the hair on my head is so much worse, i think i pull it out because my hair is curly and the frizzy bits annoy me so i pulled them and then after 2 months my hair was so thin but by then it was almost like addictive and i couldnt stop. i have my hat on all the time and most of the time have a fidget toy but i always end up getting hair out the back of the hat and pulling it out. i didnt pull my hair a whole day yesterday but then in the night i ended up pulling it i think it can also be from stress that causes me to pull it. thank you for the idea of writing notes i am gonna do it right nowww and i am so grateful i found someone who understands!!
  • Nppp @claudia.grace and good luck!! :3
  • 17 days trich free
  • @yurisen it's amazing you've made it so far!! i believe in you keep goingggg!!
  • for anyone reading i have an idea, if u always touch ur hair and then pull it out. put something on the ends that you wont want on your hands, eg. orange (get the juice out and put it on the ends) or olive oil. those are the 2 i thought of that also isnt bad for your hair. also if you want ideas for a sensory box/fidget toy box, the things in mine that are useful are, a necklace with beads (u can also wear a necklace with beads and fidget with it, or you can wear a ring or bracelet to fiddle with), a tangle fidget, a cube fidget, a fidget spinner, a broken hair tie that is nice to like stretch and stuff idk lol, disposable gloves (so u cant pull ur hair with them on), a mini hair brush (to brush ur scalp to help not pull hair), chewing gum (helps as a distraction if u rlly focus on it). and i thought of an idea to get sour sweets because u have to focus on it instead of anything else and it also can help with anxiety to focus on it. also if you have an urge to pull make a fist as tight as you can until the urge is gone it kind of helps dunno y, also drawing on ur hands kind of helps as a distraction. hope this helps someoneeee!!
  • @claudia.grace I love that you're sharing alot of tips there , I think it'll really help someone ! I hope you're doing better than before :3
  • 19 days trich free almost 3 weeks.

    To be honest these past 2 days have been the hardest. You'd think that the urges would have weakened after 2 weeks but no they haven't , that is why before I said you always need to be ready and that I won't take off my hat until after a month.

    Yesterday I almost pulled, my hand went up to the hair close to my forehead and since there's new hairs there, they are small and frizzy which is my trigger. As I was running my hand through my hair a strand came out and that almost gave me a panic attack, I quickly put my hat further down my face because of how scared I was to break my scalp pull free calendar. Today I also had an urge to pull as I was stressed not knowing how to do my homework but this time I put my hat down before I ran my hands too long through my hair ( didn't pull ). I think what triggered me alot this week was the fact that I was a week late on my period and I got it today because I know periods can mess with the hormones alot. But ofcourse I'm going to try harder to not let my hand run through my hair tomorrow because I've been on the edge of breaking my pull free streak since before yesterday.

    I hope all are doing well :3
    ~Yuri
  • Hang in there Yuri!! You are so strong. I know how those hormones can mess with you. A few more days til you get through the rough stuff and you'll probably be in the clear (at least until next month!)

    Go back and re-read your old posts. That's what I do when I need inspiration. You have such good advice and you are so positive. You can do this! (And most importantly, even if you slip up....we still love you 😍)

    Stay strong & talk soon,

    SleepySloth
  • Thanks @SleepySloth πŸ’—πŸ’—πŸ’— I hope this week will go by smoothly.
  • Day 20 scalp hair pull free πŸ†“
  • 3 weeks scalp pull free!!!! Omg I made it, this week has had me on the edge though. Another tip I'm adding to my tips is:
    - make sure not to leave your hair unwashed for more than 3 days, as soon as you feel it's dirty wash it. Today my hair has been so oily and itchy because I have been avoiding the shower as I've got alot of studying to do and above all of that I wear the hat all the time so there's not much air in there which made it worse. I didn't pull though I used my scalp massager :3

    As for my hair not getting enough air , I've started to take my hat off sometimes when I'm studying and feeling unstressed to ventilate my hair and get me prepared to take it fully off after my 1 month target, but I only take it off for a short amount of time and then as soon as I change tasks or get up I put it back on.

    Have a good day,
    ~Yuri
  • Well done Yuri! How are you doing now?

    And welcome Claudia. There's so much advice and support here. Feel free to start your own thread for support if you want to and you'll soon have a little band of cheerleaders surrounding you :)

  • Thank you @Michelle Harper I'm doing well ! ::)
  • i too scared to start my own thread thingy but it okay also πŸ˜ƒ i cut my hair short like 3 days ago but like not as short as i planned but anyways for the first time since like august 2020 i managed over a day pull free kdhskdjskd once i get past a day i feel more motivated to keep going than otherwise im kind of like what is the point (from experience about other addiction thingy since ive never got past a day with trich) but i am proud of myself and i hope i can keep going ahhhhhh πŸ€ΈπŸΌβ€β™€οΈπŸŒ‹πŸ₯°πŸŽΆπŸ€ΈπŸΌβ€β™€οΈπŸ˜ŒπŸ˜ƒ
  • Make sure to reward yourselves when you meet milestones. It doesn't have to be anything big or expensive, or a huge feat like 100 days, just be sure to recognise your achievements as you go :)

  • Way to go @claudia.grace!! I know what you mean about that one day mark. It's much easier to 'cheat' when your counter is under 24hrs. I just hit Day 2 (again) and I'm hoping to stay on track this time. Time to get the Fidgets out and make myself start using them BEFORE my urges hit. Best of luck to you Kid!!!

    Stay Strong & talk soon,

    SleepySloth
  • Aw I'm happy to see how motivated you guys are @SleepySloth + @claudia.grace , make sure you never give in to any excuses ! :3 πŸ’™

    ~Yuri
  • i made it to 3 days. i feel like after the first day i have a fear of relapsing and getting out of control again. but im trying and i cant believe ive made it this far. i am proud of you alllll keep going we have got this!!
  • That's so good @claudia.grace ! Proud of you :3
  • thank you @yurisen im proud of u 2!
  • I think it's 4 weeks now, thank you to everyone supporting me ! I'll keep coming into here to support you guys and update weekly πŸ’Ÿ

    ~ Yuri
  • Woah this is so great @yurisen!! 4 weeks!! keep going you're doing amazing <3

  • omg that is amazing @yurisen!! i got to 6 days but i ruined it so back to the start again but i hope i can get further this time.
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